


Slipped Away

by revenantforces



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Graphic Description, M/M, No Smut, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:27:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26721403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revenantforces/pseuds/revenantforces
Summary: It starts as a routine call for the 118 off the side of a cliff but things turn tragic after one of the victims being saved causes the rocks to slide.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan “Buck” Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 19
Kudos: 90





	Slipped Away

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have a beta reader and I didn't really check this over, sorry if there's a few mistakes here or there. Thanks for reading, I've never done a character death fic before!

It had started out as a routine call. Some teenagers had gone up to the cliff side to get drunk and things got out of hand when a group of girls wanted a selfie on a boulder that had been teetering imperfectly to make a treacherous platform for their vain endeavor. When the rocks had begun to dislodge, one girl managed to jump off while the other two hung precariously from brush jutting out of the carved face of earth.

The 118 responded as they usually would, Chim on the winch, Bobby overseeing, directing and decision-making, Hen ready with medical, and Buck and Eddie on rescue detail. Eddie went first the way he usually did, but Buck chose to rappel further to get to the girl at most risk. That was no surprise as he usually dove into the more harrowing stunts without giving any others time to intervene, but Eddie had almost rather he be the person to take the lead on this one. The alcove at the origin of the point the group had chosen was all ocean and broken plates of the Pacific Coast. It had been inaccessible to set up and receive them on the beach, so Bobby elected to have them ascend instead. Because the girls had been drunk, Bobby decided that separate lines for each was probably more dangerous than having them clip onto Buck and Eddie’s. It seemed like an easy enough operation and they’d performed many like it before. Still, Eddie felt he needed to say something because there had been autumn rain the past few days on and off and the weather had seemed to plan the same for that evening. A precious gift for the barren land of Los Angeles would come as a complication when trying to perform an extraction from the unpredictable surface.

“Hey,” Eddie called as Buck passed him on the way down. Through the haze of a thunderstorm dusk and the fog rolling in over the sea Eddie glanced over to asses that the girls were probably about a hundred feet from the ground below and half that distance to a smaller ledge, riddled with gravel and sharp jagged stone from pieces that had crumbled over years battered with the salted breeze. “Be careful, okay?” he said, trying to sound as though he weren’t somewhat worried.

“You know me,” Buck responded with a brilliant smile.

Eddie never failed to be struck by Buck’s smile. Or his laugh, or the way his entire aura would shine brighter than the sun on its best day when he was feeling joy. Pure joy; the kind that no adult Eddie had ever met before tended to exhibit. The men he was used to dealing with were all hardened from years of war. Buck was exactly the opposite. Loving and deep with feeling _because of_ what he’d seen. Even after that short episode where he’d tried to be ugly with the lawsuit, he couldn’t sink his teeth in because of his unwavering loyalty. Eddie admired him for it a great deal more than maybe he ever let on. There were so many things about Buck that he loved. He woke up every morning hoping that it would at last be the date he would find the courage to tell him so, especially after he’d almost lost him. But he’d gone to bed disappointed with himself at the end of each one because even after threat from the ladder truck, the tsunami, and then that stupid litigious bullshit, he never could vocalize it to the one person who needed to hear it.

“I do, that’s why I said that,” Eddie answered with his usual fondness. Buck just gave him a playful frown and turned his attention back to his task as he mapped his path with practiced grace.

Eddie reached the first Toyon bush that clung by the roots with the weight of the girl who whimpered as she dangled with waning strength. He braced himself as best he could in the crumbling dirt as he tried to ease her mind and talk her into helping him harness her. She was shaken and hesitant, but she accepted the help with gratitude. It was tricky, but Eddie managed to have her buckled up in no time, and he was tugging on his line and sending a radio confirmation to have Chim hoist them up. He began to escort her but she wrenched her arms and legs around his neck and waist on the return to the waiting crowd. The opportunity arose to check on Buck’s progress and Eddie saw that he’d also gotten to his target and was attempting to strap her in. Calm swept him when he knew that they were almost in the clear and he continued the hike to bring his charge back in one piece. He felt good about it before he heard Buck’s voice echoing up from below.

“Miss, I’m gonna need you to stay calm, okay? Neither of us can get out of here safely if you’re not cooperating with me,” he implored as she began to claw her way up the branches of the tree she was hanging onto in lieu of letting him secure her into the harness. Eddie could see that the shrub she had tumbled into was beginning to stress under the violent movement. The reddening berries that grew from it were flying in all directions as she ruffled their stalks. Eddie couldn’t handle the way they sprinkled like confetti to the waiting peril at the base.

“If I let go, I’m gonna fall! I don’t wanna fall!” she screamed as she pulled on the plant and Eddie could see the soil loosening around it.

“I don’t want that either, but you might if you don’t let me help you, do you understand? I got you for now, but you have to listen, and you have to trust me,” Buck urged as she scrambled across the foundation and Eddie’s heart dropped when he checked back and saw the ground start to sift away.

“I can’t let go! I’m gonna fall!” she kept insisting with frantic intensity.

The rest of the distance to the top was agonizing while Eddie listened to the commotion. The sound of Buck’s voice was disturbing to him as he heard unease through the strength in the direction he gave the girl who was thrashing wildly out of his control when he tried to separate her from her found sanctuary.

“We’re both gonna fall if you can’t stay still and let me do the rest, please, I need you to stop trying to climb back up!” he yelled.

The rope made a Y formation as it split off a karabiner and anchored to the harnesses; one for Buck, and one for the girl he was trying to retrieve. Eddie could see the short lines intertwining with themselves and the branches of the tree as Buck worked to fit the harness about her circumference against her fight. She wouldn’t let him put it over her head, and she kicked at him when he tried.

“You _have_ to let go real quick with one hand then the other while I put this over your head. I won’t let you fall, I promise you, just do as I say and you’ll be fine,” Buck instructed her.

“I can’t let go, I’m gonna fall if I do!” she repeated as she grabbed at the sticks.

When Eddie reached his destination and the girl he’d brought back was being treated and out of his hands he rushed back without thinking, hardly registering Bobby’s touch on his shoulder as he came to stand beside him. He tried to loosen up a bit when Buck had gotten his victim into her restraint and was trying to untangle them but the branches held the nylon like a clenched fist. Eddie felt fear bubbling in his gut as he watched the scenario unfold.

“Chim, I got her, but the line is snagged. Can you try and bring us up? She’s pretty scared and I’m losing footing fast,” Buck relayed over the radio.

“Got it, Buck, reeling it in now,” Chimney responded promptly and Eddie felt relief up to the sudden rumble when the plain beneath them started to shake.

“Everybody back, the dirt’s shifting!” Bobby ordered as he yanked on Eddie’s collar to lead him away as the cliff began to slide down enough that the edge receded a good foot or so. Eddie sprang back to the precipice immediately, ignoring Bobby’s warnings in the background.

Eddie watched in horror as Buck ducked his head when the slump started to shower them both and the girl he was trying to save lost her ever-loving mind. The moment the sediment hit her she began to dissolve into even greater hysterics and began to push her weight off of Buck’s torso in effort to scale the terrain on her own.

“Chim! Throw me another line, I’m gonna have to separate us. She’s panicking and I can’t get the rope free. When I get her secured, pull her up and I’ll handle myself,” Buck reported from the veil of dust that was forming over them as the land began to settle.

Eddie’s stomach churned while the feed he’d been hanging from minutes before was being deployed this time for the girl who’d put Buck in mortal danger. He observed his friend and colleague forfeiting care for his own soul to preserve hers when he fastened her to the new lifeline, and she was being easily towed to her protection. The smooth brown wood of the tree she’d made her home slipped through her grasp and she shrieked the whole way. She sunk her fingers and toes into the side of the mountain as she went, dragging handfuls of it with her and knocking debris in Buck’s direction. Even from so far away Eddie could tell he was struggling to see through the obstacle and he had no choice but to feel blindly for the ropes and where they were caught while he kept his head tucked into his elbow. He couldn’t look up without taking a face full of sand and he had no shot at getting himself undone unless he did. It became clear that he had a ticking clock on his back when the edge started to avalanche again.

The other firefighters and rescue personnel on scene had to take the reins when the second girl barely reached them because Eddie wouldn’t take his stare from Buck. He noted the winch’s motor humming as it pulled on his cord and he felt for a fleeting instant that everything may be okay. The sunset had begun to peek through the overcast as the stretcher bumped along the road when she was carried to the ambulance, and everyone else’s attention was placed solely on their comrade in trouble. Eddie wasted no more time and he picked up the hooks to strap himself into the harness he’d still been wearing with the line that was his to begin with.

“Eddie, I know you wanna get down there, but we have to think smart. We got him. Let’s just let the machines take care of it. We probably won’t be able to reach him anyway, we need to let the winch do the hard part,” Bobby started logically as he put his palms out to stop the motion, speaking a truth that Eddie knew at his core, but didn’t want to accept.

“But I have to try before this gets any worse,” Eddie insisted.

As if on cue, the landslide took another chunk of the ground and Eddie felt the color drain from his face when the running winch toppled along with it.

“Evan!” Eddie shouted, too frightened to realize that he had never called him that in the time they’d known each other up to that moment. The attachments Eddie held were seized from his grip as the equipment disappeared with everything else. His eyes widened and he got to his hands and knees, getting as close as was possible until he could only stare helplessly as the man who once seemed to tower over him appeared smaller by the second.

Eddie felt the impact throughout his own skeleton when he heard the faint “thump” when Buck landed like a ragdoll on the ledge below the drop and immediately he was a puddle of sobs and nerves. It was like the entire battery of combat and EMT training he’d been through had gone out the window and he was simply an onlooker in crisis. Bobby’s voice practically splintering his eardrums brought him back to reality and he jumped up like the autopilot had switched on. Sprinting toward the rig, the only thing he knew was that he had to prepare another winch so that he could reach his fallen partner. Bobby, Hen, and Chim seemed to have other plans and it only made Eddie more furious when they made moves to stop him.

“I repeat! This is Captain Robert Nash, LAFD Engine 118 requesting immediate Coast Guard assistance; we have one of our own down on the cliff side at Lunada Bay, south end closer to Agua Amarga. Prepare for blunt force trauma, internal injuries, more than likely a spinal injury, possible massive blood loss,” Bobby briefed as he hailed the big guns but Eddie decided it wasn’t enough to just wait for them and continued to construct a recovery operation of his own.

“We all wanna get to him, Eddie! But you can’t help him if you’re laying down there beside him, okay? We called the coast guard in and we’re gonna wait for a helicopter so they can get a basket and bring him up successfully. We’re not gonna rush in and end up in the same position,” Bobby advised. Wisely, of course, but Eddie couldn’t see reason when the image of Buck’s body hitting the rocks was flooding his brain.

“That’s an order, Diaz!” Bobby continued as Eddie dismissed him and hammered the spikes into a patch of land a few feet away from where they’d originally set everything up before.

“So write me up! Fire me! Whatever you’re gonna do, I’m not gonna leave him down there!” Eddie called as he clamped up and hooked himself in defiantly.

“Nobody wants to leave him down there! But if you try and go down now, that mountain may come down on _you._ It’s already unstable enough as it is! It’s probably gonna give again from all the agitation!” Bobby was right, but Eddie wasn’t too concerned for himself at the time.

“And when it does it’s gonna bury him alive if he’s not already-” Eddie cut himself off before he could even think it and proceeded to go in after him.

Chimney took a deep breath in before he grabbed a nylon rope and began to suit up to join him. “I’m going with him,” he vowed solemnly while Eddie was already making his way too quickly to have heard it. Bobby grabbed his arm and froze him in his tracks.

“Chim, I know you saw what happened just now. She can’t lose her brother and her boyfriend on the same day,” Bobby warned, referring to Maddie and the tragedy she’d most certainly already suffered.

“You think he’s dead?” Hen worried, as though she didn’t.

“That’s gotta be, what, a sixty foot plummet into nothing but rock? He’s wearing a helmet but that’s about it,” Bobby gulped, visibly thrown for the first time since it happened. “He’s a tough kid, but I don’t know if he’s that tough,” he breathed, unsteady, unsure, and unable to hold it back.

Chimney’s face soured and he dropped his hands, perhaps for the first time considering that Maddie would have to hear about this, and he would most likely be the one who’d have to tell her. Hen put her arm around him before she went to operate the winch that Eddie had turned on by himself as Bobby’s instinct kicked in. He reached up and pressed the transmitter on his radio, preparing himself before he plead into it.

“Buck, this is Bobby, do you copy?” he tried the first time.

“Buck, it’s Bobby, do you copy?” he inquired with more strife.

“Buck!” he croaked into the microphone, his mouth hanging open until it crackled in answer.

“I’m… here, Cap.” But it didn’t sound like Buck. His voice was weak and his breath was so labored that it broke up the words. Eddie shuddered when he heard it over the airwaves but he had to stay sharp if he wanted to help him at all when he finally got to where he lay.

“Sounds like a punctured lung,” Hen diagnosed as tears welled behind her glasses. Bobby viced his eyelids and for the first time, braved an aftermath glance from the side of the cliff. He bit his lip when it started to tremble as he watched Eddie trek his way down to where his all-but-adopted son had come to rest and in his mind he confirmed the worst as he acknowledged that Buck remained motionless amidst the cascaded rubble.

“Please, God, I can’t lose another one,” Bobby prayed as he collapsed, not even coherent that he’d said it out loud until Chim was wrapping him into a tight hold.

“We can’t think like that, Cap. This is Buck we’re talking about, he’s too self-centered to let himself die,” Chimney joked out of pure grief and tried to hold his composure after he’d made the remark.

“Hang in there, Buckaroo,” Hen’s voice radiated over the static, meant to keep Buck present.

Eddie heard it, too, but didn’t have the luxury of a supportive distraction as he bobbed his way along carefully and alone. The only thing he could think about was what may be waiting for him and though he’d wanted to, he couldn’t get himself to peer beneath him. He’d still have to troop his way a few feet over to get to where Buck had fallen, so he began to follow diagonal points that would bring him closer while still maintaining stability within the land. When he was as close as he could get, he decided to ditch the line and unhook so that he could free-climb the rest of the way. The slack he’d been given was too short and he felt the hourglass emptying on Buck’s existence the longer it took him to get to where he was. When he was finally face-to-face with him, Eddie was slightly regretting not listening to Bobby and waiting up top with the others.

It was less gory than Eddie had expected, but the sight of crimson contrasting the fair skin around Buck’s mouth made him queasy for the first time since he’d learned how to deal with it as a profession. He was lying somewhat curled up like he’d fallen asleep in the fetal position and then had been rolled onto his back. His right arm crossed his chest as though he’d used that hand to work the radio when he’d answered to Bobby, but Eddie could see the radial bone protruding from his sleeve so he knew it couldn’t have been the case. He got to his knees as he waved his hands hesitantly over Buck’s ailing frame, afraid to make any contact with him because that would make everything inescapably real.

“Hey, Buck, I gotcha, I’m here,” Eddie soothed him as he put a tentative palm atop his heaving chest.

His face somewhat tilted toward the ground, he still seemed blissfully unaware until Eddie smoothed the back of his fingertips to Buck’s cheek with utter gentleness. His skin was cold and his long lashes fluttered as he trained his gaze to meet Eddie’s concern. Eddie noticed he didn’t turn his head, and he tried to keep himself together when he sputtered and coughed as he chanced an exchange.

“Eddie,” he sighed as though the sentiment was hardly available to leave his lungs. “I fucked up,” he added with painstaking effort.

“No, you did good, Buck! That girl is safe, and I’m gonna get you out of here, too, okay? Bobby called the Coast Guard, they’re on their way,” Eddie tried to reassure him at the same time he was trying to chill himself out.

Buck flinched when Eddie ghosted his parts with his fingertips, and even though he was trying not to touch, he needed to see how bad it was. He yelped when Eddie pressed not even hard enough to select his floor on an elevator, and Eddie had almost hoped he wouldn’t be able to feel anything as he continued his inspection. He could tell Buck had several cracked ribs, one had probably pierced his lung, his pelvis appeared completely shattered, and Eddie wasn’t even sure how he was still conscious as it appeared the blood in his mouth was because he was hemorrhaging from invisible intestinal wounds. There wasn’t much room where they’d been to land on any surface other than brutal rock.

Buck confirmed Eddie’s worry when he spoke again between gulps of breath. “It hurts to breathe.”

“I know it does, so you’re gonna be still and quiet, okay? Don’t talk anymore,” Eddie told him.

“Eddie,” he rattled again, this time taking all his energy to address him. When he looked up at him Eddie could see that the side of his head that had been to the stone was completely stained red and there had grown a small pool glittering against the surface.

“Shhh,” Eddie tried to hush him in favor of keeping his vitals intact. “Don’t move,” he beseeched.

“I love you,” he choked out, the phrase so meek but powerful enough that it knocked Eddie onto his ass. Eddie’s gut lurched when he heard the words and he couldn’t help the hot tears that had started to stream.

“Don’t say that right now,” Eddie contested, taking Buck’s left hand into both of his delicately. He kissed his knuckles as he watched Buck wince when he took a breath in.

“I should’ve said it before,” Buck scolded himself through much difficulty.

“We’ll have plenty of time,” Eddie lied, silently making his case to the universe why he deserved an appeal. Selfishly he decided that Buck couldn’t leave him if they had unfinished business as the Coast Guard chopper whipped the air above them.

“I’m so tired,” Buck argued as he started to drift off.

“No, Evan, look at me! Don’t close your eyes, stay with me!” Eddie patted his face as he monitored their progress in the sky with desperation.

“I love you, too,” Eddie sniffled hurriedly when Buck obeyed, but only half way. His bright blue irises had washed out to a dull gray and they were glossy and vacant, and though he could still hear Buck’s gurgling breath he knew he was losing him too quickly for there to be another opportunity for him to say it back in the future. He never could’ve guessed he’d find the will when he was broken beyond repair.

Buck’s lips twitched into the most fragile smile before his expression blanked completely and the medic took over. Eddie immediately began to perform CPR though his chest was so soft he felt clumsy and inept like he'd forgotten how. The basket and two lines had been dropped from the cabin of the helicopter that floated high above them and two men were on their way. But with the situation already past critical, it didn’t seem quick enough to Eddie.

“No, no, no, Evan, come on, don’t do this to me!” he begged him as he pumped at an expired heart with no hope and Eddie scooped Buck into his arms without thinking about the consequences of such a jarring move. He knew it didn’t matter anymore. The waves crashing below them, the men barking at him over the blades cutting the wind, and the walls completely caving in on him seemed to make not a sound when all he could decipher was misery consuming every sense he owned.

Everything moved too fast. Buck was being torn from Eddie’s embrace and he was held in place when he tried to steal him back. The harness he’d already worn was being rigged to the helicopter for him and he could only watch as he hung suspended in midair while the paramedics on the ledge loaded Buck into the basket. He was grateful that the sorrow seeping from his tear ducts had blurred his vision when the attending men determined that there was nothing else they could do and began to wrap him in the body bag they’d brought in case of necessity.

As he was being shuttled into his seat by the crew in the cab Eddie tried to steel himself for when they would collect the basket into the helicopter. He tried to prepare for when he’d have to see Buck’s sparkless face again. Then he wondered if he would even be allowed to before the funeral when everyone else did. He wasn’t family and he wasn’t his partner- they’d never get the chance to be at that stage now. Then he realized it wouldn’t matter because the image of him fading to black in front of him would probably never let him sleep another night. He fell to pieces all over again when he thought about the moment he’d have to tell Christopher that he was gone.

“Eddie,” Bobby’s voice seemed alien after everything he’d just been through, but Eddie tilted his attention that direction. He wouldn’t give him the eye contact; he still couldn’t look away from the candy apple fabric that had his heart zipped beneath it.

The mill of people who’d been gathered at the cliff side for the initial rescue was still buzzing outside but Eddie couldn’t discern any of it. He didn’t remember how he’d gotten from the helicopter to the back of an ambulance where he sat feeling like he would never be whole again. He couldn’t have told anyone how long it had been dark- he didn’t notice when the sun had set. He knew only that he couldn’t leave Buck’s side. Not quite yet. He was grateful when instead of pushing him Bobby just hopped into the back and sat down beside him to wordlessly squeeze him close as he cried into his chest the entire ride to the hospital.


End file.
